that one there

she looks just like me



being happy

is she me?”


Reminds me of a documentary I saw a couple weeks ago about two twin girls who were adopted by separate families. One was adopted in the States while the other was adopted in France. It must be freaky finding a long lost twin you never knew you had, or for any twin, to see yourself but in a different body so to speak. But this could also go much deeper. A little girl who is lost, longing for a family, and sees a girl with a life that she longs to have. A life that she dreamed about so much it almost seems so real that that happy girl could be here. If you dream hard enough it could happen.





open to me

like the heavens


on a rainy day.”

To me it sounds like someone is asking for rain. I don’t like rain. I don’t hate it, I just have to be in the right mood for it. At the same time it sounds like someone who is seeking honesty from another and wants its to be poured upon them like the rains from the heavens. Honesty can be hard to come by, but it shouldn’t be.



it hailed

on my heart

that day

i felt the ice harden.”

Honesty was not given, but a lie was told. It hurt like all lies do. It weighs heavy on the heart and stays there for both the liar and the one lied to until the honesty is spoken  and forgiveness is given. With forgiveness the hurt will melt just as easily as ice under hot water.




i see

through seeing owl


When I read this I think of two things. The first, I have to say, is being able to turn my head all the around just like an owl. I mean how cool would that be. I could see everything without actually having to turn around. The second thing is my best friend Vanya. She loves owls. I’m going to have to find some kind of purple owl some where to get her for Christmas. To bad it can’t be a real purple owl.






my soul recognizes yours. ”

To be honest I don’t sure what the first three words mean or if they mean what the last line says. Going with the last line, it sounds like love binding two together and they are made for each other. They recognized this from the first time they saw each other, but they didn’t want to jinx it or admit it, so they kept quit. But they held on.



shaking off debris

pulling up old roots

clipping branches

baby bird is free.”

I just find it a cute story…but if only one could see an unborn baby like they do a baby bird caught in tree branches.



what do you wager

she was feeling


We all make mistakes and miss judge the going on’s. But one or another we are all faithful. The question is, what are we faithful too?



dark heart.”



what do you mean



We all have flaws that we don’t like. We all have something about our body, our looks that we don’t like. And when we find those things we intend to not like who we are. We have to remind ourselves that we are who we are from the day we are born and nothing can change that. We are flawed, but beautifully flawed.







Turkey Day aka…Thanksgiving!

And do I get a turkey, I think so. Haha, I will be spending this day at work, but thankfully a thanksgiving meal will be dished out for us. Since my family shrunk to half its size, we just don’t celebrate like we used to. I’m okay with that though. I love my family to too much to care. Plus I get paid time and a half! No complaints there.

What am I thankful for???????????????????

1. I am thankful for books! Considering my passion for reading and living in a different world.

2. I am thankful for pens and paper. As a writer I need them.

3. I am thankful for my family and all the flaws and drama that comes along with them. 

4. I am thankful for my relationship with God. We so tight!

5. I am thankful for life!

6. I am thankful for laughter.

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

Working on math and updating my blog at the same time. Now that is what I call multi tasking. I am also enjoying some Pentatonix on Spotify to liven up the mood. School is winding down and fast. I have the whole week off, but that doesn’t mean I get to have a full week of just fun. No, that just means I have more time to study and prepare for exams.

But I am eager for December to be here. Not only does it bring School to an end, it also brings my boyfriend here. Oh wait…here! Probably should add that exclamation point. Unless my emotions are much like Spock’s. He already bought his ticket and the dates are now saved. For a while all we did was just talk about, but now its gonna happen for reals! I’m not nervous, yet. More like just ready to for the month to get here.

It’s almost been year since we officially got together, though we never went on a date. A long distance relationship can do that to a couple. But me, I’m chill with it. I liked the taking it a slow part. With family stuff it was best for me. However, now I am ready. My dad on the other hand…speaking of hands. My dad says we can hold hands just not around him. Its funny seeing my dad this way. This is the first boy and even though my dad is ready for to grow up, he is not ready for me to go in this direction. I say whatevs. Nah, I love my dad and I would never date someone my folks didn’t approve of. They know whats best and our relationship is not something I want to destroy.

SNEAKER - WIN_20150222_144946

He will be staying here at my house, while I stay at my grandparents. For night time purposes that is. The two of us seem to be on the same page with a lot of things. Like sex. Which is an important thing to me. I will be saving that till after I am married. Its nice to have someone who agrees with me on accepts like this. I know a lot of people have different opinions on the matter and other matters. But I am standing my ground in what I believe. And Church, both of us are Catholic. So it’s one church and one faith. And it wont be occurred for either of us.

It’s funny though, his family is ready to meet him and my family well…actually my grandma is anxious to meet him. My grandma is a hoot! I know they will get along really swell.

My dad just informed me that we will going out to eat and getting smelt! Totally excited. Math is going to have to wait. The SMELT is calling!


Poetry Part 3


take your dreams

alongside me

whisper in my ear

those daydreams

that others wouldn’t understand

i love you.”

A bond that only two special people can possibly understand. A bond that only two people can share secrets with and be completely truthful.


in the morning

before the wake

light on your hair

your lips perfect

i remember

why i fell in love.”

I can just picture this whole scene. A couple lying in bed covered by the sheets. As the sun is rising the husband rolls over and looks over at his wife. Her hair is auburn and it is shinning from the sunlight. She still sleeping as he looks upon her, reminiscing about how they met, the first kiss they made, and the first time the each told each other I love you.



clean air

fresh look

sweet dreams

new day.”

Gosh, sounds like house cleaning day. Hate those days. Unless its my room and I’m in the right mood.

“i ought to get back to work

but from here

the sun shines so bright.”

We all have those days where we say we need to get this or that done, but something else seems to come up. And it isn’t always the sun. Though that would probably be a better excuse than Netflix. Mine is usually a book. Or two. Or three. Or seven.


“i’ll climb among your feathers

i’ll feast on your remains

i’ll keep flying.”

The life cycle of animals. Need I say more?


there was something

in her eyes

that made me think

she wanted freedom.”

I just got done reading a book called “One Thousand White Women The Journals of May Dodd” by Jim Fergus. There was a character in the book named Phemie. She was black and was raised in slavery. She broke free and ended up in the program where a thousand white women were given as brides to a tribe of Indians. Phemie refused to be a slave again. She didn’t exactly follow the rules that the Women Indians follow. She followed her own rules, she followed the men. Her idea of freedom was to be herself and to break free from normal. She wanted freedom and she got, she had it even up to her death.


dream on

you little fool


If you insist. I love to dream and it is one of my favorite past times. It also gives me great ideas for coming up with a story. I am actually working on one now and it is nearly finished. If it got published that would be so cool. I guess that’s something I’m dreaming about now.



some thoughts

just made them ache.”

This is exactly how I feel when it comes to math. I am still waiting to hear how I did on my last test. At least this time I don’t have my stomach in knots waiting in anticipation like last time. What makes you have aches?


why should we hide

the beauty

we feel?”

We should never hide who we are. Some people express themselves with tattoos and piercings, being goth or emo. Those aren’t ways I would go about expressing myself, since I am not a fain of those things. Just two piercings in each ear. I express myself with color. I love color. If I wear black I always, always, have a splash of color. I also express myself with the books I read. I always carry a book in bag. I never leave the house without one. When I do by accident I feel naked, exposed. Just be you…


she was just saying that

because she hurt

so bad.”

Sometimes we say things, but we don’t mean them. People intend to say mean and horrible things when they are upset. Or it is their way of crying out for help. A strange way, yes; however, they may feel a little embarrassed about what they are going through. But hey! when one speaks out they, in the end, find that they are not alone.